Michael L. Parks

These are a few of my favorite quotes so far from Christian Atheist by Craig Groeschel. If you haven’t read it yet, I encourage you to check it out.

“Locked in a prison of shame, many Christian Atheists hate their pasts and themselves in equal measure — and there seems to be no hope of escape” (49).
“I learned to equate what I did with who I was….I hadn’t done something bad; I WAS bad. I honestly believed that if people knew the real me, they wouldn’t like me at all. And that went double for God” (49).
“Like a child who repeatedly picks at a scab, many hurt people live a life of unhealed pain” (51).
“When we let shame control our actions, we cannot know God, because we cannot live our lives for him” (51).
“Christian Atheists believe in God and even believe that God loves people, but always other people, who are less sinful or more important” (65).

I really feel like I could have written chapters 2 and 3, or that they were written for me. I am discovering that the biggest barrier between God and me is not my sin but the shame I feel from my sin. It keeps me from experiencing closeness which, in turn, keeps me from growing into who he wants me to become.

I have no problem speaking grace and forgiveness into other people’s lives, and I actually believe that they are completely forgiven and free from that sin and the burden of shame. Why can I not believe that for my own life? Why do I believe that God can change the life of any other person but mine?

I know I am not the only one who struggles with this. Why do we do this to ourselves? I hope and pray that we can be like Paul, who wrote “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3.13b-14). If God can not only forgive Paul for murdering and persecuting Christians, but also develop him into one of the most influential people in Christianity, then surely he can forgive me and use me for something important. I think I’m beginning to believe that.